Who Are These Billionaires?

Greetings most people and many others,

This morning I heard on the news that there are four hundred billionaires in the United States! What I want to know is where are these rich people, and why can't I live with one of them? Missy Linda says that none of them would waste his or her time taking me places or doing things with me. What an insult!

I think that I just had the bad luck to get purchased or found or whatever happened that I got in this family by the wrong people. Surely, anyone who met me would love to spend a little of her free time making my life fabulous! After all, I don't ask for much.

All I want is some designer clothes, a few nights out a week, being allowed to throw a couple of parties a month and maybe a few trips every year. I feel that would be so easy for a rich person to provide, don't you? Missy Linda just has that crappy job at a fabric store, and she goes to school! Big deal! She has not gotten me invited to one fraternity party! I just think that has to be from lack of effort on her part, don't you?