That's Why It's Called Junk Food

Hello most humans and many others,

Well, I guess we aren't having an Oscar watch party this year. Are you? Missy Linda says she is feeling kind of yukky. I could tell her why if she cared to ask me. She has eaten nothing but junk food all day. I can honestly say that I don't even remember the last time that there were donuts in the house - - - not that donuts are the only junk food that she eats on occasion.

Maybe it will be a while before she spends a day like this again. She is whining about a headache and an upset stomach. Well, from what I understand, that's what happens to you humans when you do things that aren't good for you - - - especially when you do it all day long. I can only hope it is some time before I have to listen to this particular whining again. She is supposed to be getting stuff sorted and packed, and she isn't going to get it done on this diet of unquestionably unhealthful foods. I guess I can only hope tomorrow will be better in this regard. She is too old to live on this kind of stuff, like sugar and grease, and I don't know what all else. That's why you all call it junk food.

Finally!

Hello most humans and many others,

I heard Missy Linda and Tio Kane talking about making a timeline to get this move done. Finally!

I'm not exactly sure what all moving entails, and I was beginning to think I would never find out. I have been moved, as I was passed from one person to another back when I was a gag Christmas gift. Yeah. How do you think that would make you feel? I didn't really know what was going on because I was in a bag, and I couldn't see a thing until someone pulled me out. I would be in a different place. Then I would get put back in the bag.

I will say that at least at Missy Linda's house, I have spent more time out of the bag than in one. I suppose that even if I don't get to go as many places as I used to, at least I'm mostly out of the bag.

Vivid Dreams

Hello most humans and many others,

Wow! I think that it is going to be a weird day around here. Missy Linda was telling Tio Kane that she had a honkingly (whatever that is) vivid dream last night. He said he needed to read for class, so she had to shut up right then. She won't be able to shake the strange feelings that some of these dreams cause her to have until she tells someone about it.

Sadly, I had to listen to some of her raving. It seems that the thing that make the dreams "vivid" are that they seem totally real. Missy Linda said she has to stop and think to decide if what happened was real or not. She has trouble coming back to reality the day after a really bad vivid dream, especially if it involves a house where she used to live or something like that.

Missy Linda says that the worst dreams she has have either her former husband or her mother. The dream last night evidently had both those people plus a bunch of other relatives and acquaintences whom she doesn't want to be in touch with - - - some still here and some dead.

Well, I have to run for today. Missy Linda seems as if she might be on her way off that proverbial cliff. I'll let you know if anything good happens. By "good," you know I mean crazy or entertaining, right?

New Neighborhood This Week

Hello most humans and many others,

Well, here I am again, forgetting that I haven't been writing this week about the things that have been happening to me. I suppose that all that time I spent recently head down in a shopping bag must have affected my memory, at least temporarily.

I had reported recently that a large house on a corner near our new house had replaced its boarded up windows with glass windows and curtains, making it look so much more neighborly. Well, Tio Kane reported to me that only two large windows had been replaced. All right, but that's still better than it was.

Early yesterday morning, around 3:00 am, two women were killed near our new house while crossing the railroad track. It wasn't the huge intersection at Britton and Western where there are arms that lower. It was a smaller intersection near there where the accident happened. There were flashing lights, but no arms. Missy Linda will need to be very vigilant about things like that around there.  She doesn't take such great care of me, but it's better than being thrown in the trash or worse. I don't know what would happen to me if she died, but it could be worse than living with her. I think I want to stay where we live now, as boring as that is.

I need to talk to her about her will and last wishes. I need to make sure she arranges care for me.

Oh, Mr. Nick!

Hello most humans and many others,

Yesterday there was what Missy Linda called a "classic Mr. Nick" event. Tio Kane and Mr. Nick were moving furniture and things out of storage in Mr. Nick's pick-up. Mr. Nick had just given Tio Kane a safety talk about the bungee cord things they were using to secure the load in the truck. Tio Kane went to sit in the cab while Mr. Nick finished fastening down the cords.

All of a sudden, Tio Kane heard, "Aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhh!" When he turned to see what happened, there was Mr. Nick flat on his back in the parking lot. Because it was Mr. Nick, Tio Kane immediately assumed the worst possible scenario. Was his neck or back broken? Did he have a terrible head injury from hitting the concrete?

Fortunately (?), Mr. Nick had been hit in the mouth and not his eye, and his back, neck, skull, and teeth seemed to be okay. There was a gushing split in his swelling lip, but that appeared to be the only injury.

From what I have heard Missy Linda say, Mr. Nick has had his share of accidental injuries. She was attempting to count the number of breaks to his left arm and hand the other day, and it was hard for her to decide on an accurate count. Oh, Mr. Nick!

New Lights, New Windows

Hello most humans and many others,

Missy Linda was happier today when she got back from the house we are moving to. She said that the new outside lights that the landlord had put up look so much better than the old, broken, mismatched fixtures that were there. Also, the rest of the windows were put in this afternoon. Every window except the big one in the living room have been replaced now. Missy Linda is worried that Mr. Nelson won't like the windows in this house because he won't be able to see out of many of them. They are more like regular windows, and where we live now, the windows go low enough for him to see out of many of them. He likes to keep an eye on his world.

Another thing Missy Linda was happy about today was the change in the big house on the corner. It is a big two story brick home that had boarded up windows and appeared to have had a fire. All of a sudden, the windows were fixed, and there were curtains. It helps a lot in taking away that crack house feeling from the street. It was the only derelict house that could be seen from our house, so the ambiance was palpable. Now it seems like a regular street, as far as one can see, anyway.

Hello most humans and many others,

From my perch atop to dining table, looking out the front window, I saw a sad sight this morning. It was Big Trash Day in our neighborhood. Missy Linda had dragged out the poor old blue sofa from the family room. It really wasn't that old; it was just not high quality furniture to begin with. It had holes worn through on the seat cushions. It had some holes on either end made by a previous kitty. The frame was snapped in half in one place which made it start to cave in upon itself. It was hideous. It smelled funny.

The embarrassing part is that it was still there when the trash dudes came. Usually, there isn't much left by Monday morning because people drive around and "shop" the night before. It is just a sad sign of poor Missy Linda's life: nobody wants her discards because she totally uses them up and sucks them dry. Poor Missy Linda.

First Black Eye

Hello most humans and many others,

Last night Missy Linda and Tio Kane had dinner with Missy Emma, Missy Ryley, Missy Lesley, and Mr. Nick. No, I was not invited. They completely forgot about me, as usual.

However, I heard that the company for the evening was quite entertaining. For instance, Missy Emma, 5, regaled everyone (with a little help from Mom, Missy Lesley) with the story of how she recently got her first black eye.

Missy Emma and Missy Ryley were playing at the home of Missy Emma's best friend since they were one year old, Mr. Omar. Missy Ryley is also a friend of Mr. Omar's sister, Missy Lena. Well, as frequently happens when kids get together, a great idea was born. At the top of a tall staircase, Mr. Omar is zipped up snugly into a suitcase and pushed off the precipice of the first step. Thump! Thump! Thump! Missy Lesley and Mr. Omar's mother rush to find out what is happening. As Mr. Omar's ride nears the bottom step, his mother reaches out to grab the suitcase as it goes off course. Somehow in the melee, Missy Emma gets punched in the eye accidently as the suitcase gets unzipped. Mr. Omar jumps out and yells, "That was great!"

Missy Linda says that its comforting that some things about being kids never change.

On the Edge

Hello most humans and many others,

Well, I'm finally back. After nearly an eternity being head first in a shopping bag, lost under coats on a dining chair, I was finally rescued when Missy Linda was looking for something else. (!) Now, we're moving to a different house. At least, I'm assuming that I'm moving with them - - - there's a lot of stuff going into the trash! 

I have heard Missy Linda and Tio Kane talking about where we are moving, but I haven't been there yet.  I can't really picture what it's going to be like from what they say. They keep mentioning that it's on the edge.

On the corner of the next block is a large brick boarded up house surrounded by regular looking houses. One block one way is a neighboorhood of small, older, mostly run down homes with about every fifth one boarded up and with some graffiti here and there. The farther that direction you go, the more depressing it gets.

One block the other direction are larger, upper middle class homes with fancy cars in the driveways. The back yards of these homes are large with trampolines and play forts for the well-dressed children who live there. The mothers there jog while pushing expensive running strollers.

I think it's kind of a warning for Missy Linda. It gives her a distinct picture of where she can go. If she doesn't put her nose to the grindstone or come up with some great ideas, she could move one direction, but if she keeps going downhill, she could move the other. On the edge might be a terrifying place to live, or it might be an inspiring place to live. We'll see.