Weird Hair

Hello most humans and many others,

I am doing some research on human hair. Perhaps you humans can provide some assistance. I understand that you humans have hair that grows; then you get it cut; then it grows back. Personally, I don't have that kind of hair cycles. My hair is long and curly and luxurious all the time. I can wear it up or down. That is the only decision with which I am faced.

Missy Linda seems to have all kinds of stupid, insignificant problems with her hair. Get this: She says that some days her hair is curly, and some days it is not curly. I know some women straighten theirs with those hot straightening tools, but she seems to think her problem is unique. Missy Linda seems to think her dilemmas are unusual and special. I think they are just boring!

I have also noticed that the color of Missy Linda's hair changes. I am pretty sure that she does that to herself! Sometimes it's kind of the color they call "strawberry blond," and then after a while, it seems to turn kind of yellow with dark and gray stripes down next to her head. At that point, she runs around the house for awhile smelling like I don't even know what with a plastic bag thing on her head. Then she has "strawberry blond" hair again! I think that perhaps she needs to be taken to a quiet place "for her own good." I should get to work on that.